I find myself recognizing that there are many things that inform how I walk and where I walk internally each day. My emotional reality changes from moment to moment and when I take a step back to grab a breath and some perspective I recognize that I have usually been here before.. wherever here is. And with that recognition comes a sense of timeless connection with the rest of creation. Sometimes that connective experience feels like God. Other times, it is just too close, to comfortable and intimate. Have you ever known a place so well you could navigate it blind and without a worry? Have you ever experienced that much trust? It can actually surprise me that much, and it did a lot of the time, in the beginning. Since I began some simple but profound morning and evening practices, I have been brought to a profound gratitude for the basic supportive elements of my life. Warmth, shelter, wholesome and good tasting food, exercise, reading a good book, or talking with caring friends.
Accepting and moving through my day with a felt sense of being known, seen and felt in this way still feels frightening sometimes. I lived most of my life throwing up barriers that prevented me from seeing or feeling anything outside myself, or anything or anybody from getting to close or knowing me at my most vulnerable, inside my self and my experience imposed walls.. From many conversations with others, I have discovered that this is a common experience for some of us.